halo incarnates

having racing thoughts. don’t like it. hard for mind to be quiet. don’t want to be crushed. don’t want bad things to happen. not cutting. feel like we have to. but am not. am not. am not. hate feeling like we have to cut. hate feeling like it’s needed. hate how our skin feels numb. sometimes we can feel. sometimes skin is numb. better to feel. hate how body doesn’t work right. am supposed to cut. can tell. skin is numb so it wouldn’t hurt. but not cutting. am being good. am not evil. not evil. not evil. am being good. hate having racing thoughts. hate feeling like we will be trapped. hate feeling like we will be hurt. not a coward. am not a coward. not a coward. was called a coward by evil hateful bad father. am not that. not what he said we were. not stupid. not a coward. not stupid. hate racing thoughts. mind will not be quiet. am not cutting. need to cut we will resist. have resisted. will resist. am stronger now. not like before.