am willow

was pretty today
windy and cool
pretty sky
some trees have flowers now
pink and white
so pretty
am glad the trees are waking up
saw yellow and purple flowers

Indigo Incarnates

I got tagged with a MeMe by Whimsical (via her Facebook account). Since I can never resist these, I'm posting them below. I'm tagging Java, Joan, Tiger Yogi, and Doug!

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Tag 15 people to do the same thing (and me, too). 1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Considering that I'm an alter that replaced someone else, I'm guessing the answer is "no", ha ha.

2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? When my friend Jewel died.

3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? It's pretty good.

4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? I'm a vegetarian!

5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Oh hell no!

6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I just don't know.

7. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Yes, all the time!

8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes

9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? I doubt it. I've done hang gliding, parasailing, motorcycling, but - don't want to do bungee jumping.

! 10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Reces Puffs

11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? Yes

12. YELLOW LIGHT: SPEED UP OR SLOW DOWN? Depends on how close I am to it, but generally I floor it!

13. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Peanut butter

14. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Attitude, then whether they have their teeth.

15. RED OR PINK? Red

16. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? I hate how I so often feel incomplete.

17. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? I'm not sure. I've never had really close relationships with my family.

18. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST? Only if they want to.

19. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? Blue denim, old Rebocks..

20. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? A Mystery Science 3000 movie.

21. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? SOne of those funky ones that write in a bunch of colors at once.

22. FAVORITE SMELLS? Church incense.

23. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My friend Jeff.

24. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON/PEOPLE WHO SENT THIS TO YOU? Yes

25. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Uh... I'm a gay man. Sports? Ha ha ha ha!

26. HAIR COLOR? Mostly brown with some white.

27. EYE COLOR? Blue

28. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? Nope, they bug me

29. FAVORITE FOOD? Vegetarian Indian food, super spicy.

30. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Scary movies that have happy endings!

31. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? "Support Your Local Sheriff"

32. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Black.

33. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer

34. HUGS OR KISSES? Depends on the person
35. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Probably Java.

36. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Not sure.

37. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? "Dead Beat", by Jim Butcher (a Dresden novel).

38. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? I use a digitizer tablet, so I don't have a mouse pad.

39. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? I didn't watch TV last night.

40. FAVORITE SOUND(S). The wind, bird song, a powerful thunderstorm.

41. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Is there a third option?

42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Grand Caymen, when I was on a cruise.

43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Hmmm.... I'll have to think about that one.

44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? The body was born in Huntingdon, PA. I came into being in 1982 when the person who used to have this body lived in Marietta, GA.

45. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Anyone I tagged

46. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? We met in Borders' Bookstore..

Indigo Incarnates

Today is Palm Sunday and it occurs to me that, other than technology, not a lot about the human condition has changed in two thousand years.

If you really want to read between the lines, Jesus was essentially executed for what would today be considered "disorderly conduct" at the very most (and even that would be thrown out). But in that day, the politically connected religious right of that day persuaded the government to kill Jesus because he had a religious message they disagreed with.

I have to wonder: Would Pat Robertson, Pope Benedict, or Fred Phelps *really* acknowledge Jesus as their lord? I doubt it. I find it more likely that those three would denounce Jesus and try to get him arrested on trumped-up charges. After all, Jesus preached about charity, inclusion, and equality. He didn't condemn gays. He didn't preach that a woman's place is in the home. He certainly didn't preach any sort of "prosperity gospel". No, he called the religious right a whitewashed tomb. He said that the selfish rich who ignored the poor would have a hard time getting into heaven. Jesus has but one commandment: love God and love each other.

That's something the religious right of that time just couldn't tolerate. Two thousand years later, the religious right still rejects Christ's message of love, charity, inclusion, and social justice. The religious right is still an instrument of the ruling government.

The modern-day church still tolerates the murder of homosexuals and pagans,. Likewise, the church still blames disasters (911 and Katrine just to name two) on unpopular minorities. The church teaches people how to hate and who it acceptable to kill and who deserves to die.

I don't think Jesus would recognize the Church as an institution based on his teachings.

Indigo Incarnates

I am really proud of Doug this week. He's gone on four 2-mile walks around the neighborhood. I went out with him on a walk tonight and took some pictures of trees along the 2-mile circuit.
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Halo incarnates

Am tired. Knees hurt all night. Would make pain stop. Can do that. Made it stop. But then knees would hurt later. Then would make it stop. Then knees would hurt again. Made us tired. Can control pain. Can make it stop. But makes us tired to do it. Am tired. Was a long night. Not much sleep. Body is tired. Hate how body won't work right. Body doesn't work right sometimes. Want it to work right. Am always trying. Am being good. Am always trying. Am tired now. Don't know why body has to hurt for no reason. Didn't get hurt, but body hurts. Doesn't work right sometimes. Don't know why. Can control pain. Makes us tired sometimes, but can do it. Am tired now. Have to work but am tired. Am being good. Am always trying. Am not evil. Am being good. Am always trying. Trying hard.

Indigo Incarnates

I managed to get a no-goodnick locked up today at work. I think the felon in question was possibly the least amenable person ever on my case book. He was a gun-toting drug dealer who alsso had a history of beating up his girlfriend. He was also a counterfeitter (maybe he misinterpreted his mom's instruction to "go make some money", ha ha!) Hic supervised case was for drug possession. He was on drugs too, but wasn't interested in drug treatment. Oh, and he had a pending case for stealing someone's car. He had two seperate active probation supervisions for theft and counterfeiting. He'd also violated probation six times. He gave a bogus address and bogus phone number to the court.

But here's the kicker: despite having fourteen convictions -- including armed robbery -- some idiot court commissioner let him out of the clink on personal recognizance and said I had to supervise this dude. Nice.

Like this guy's going to show up for court.

Well, he missed to appointments -- the bare minimum needed to trigger a rescind. The judge read my petition and issued a rescind warrant with a $2,500 preset cash bail. I doubt this guy has $25. Good riddance.

Indigo Incarnates

Y'know... There are times when I wonder if the Vatican could have picked a more clueless Pope to be the successor to John Paul II. He made some Papal "pronouncements" that just left me scratching my head.

"Condoms Spread the AIDS Virus". Really? How's that happen? Beats me. But the Pope visited some of the poorest, most disease-ridden parts of Africa last week and commanded the faithful there to not practice safe sex. That's right. In an area of the world where AIDS is spreading like a wildfire, Pope Bene forbids people from using condoms.

How can this guy live with himself when he knows damned well that he gave advice that will literally get hundreds of thousands of people killed?

"Reject the Cloud of Evil that is Paganism". Excuse me? Pagans are evil? Since when? Apparently the Pope views the Pagan worldview as one rife with fear and superstition. Hmmm... But isn't it Catholicism that uses fear on a regular basis as a tool for controlling the masses. As for superstition... Catholicism is based on the idea of ransoming the dead out of purgatory by donating vast sums of cash to the church. If that's not superstition, I don't know what is. Anyway, it's usually been the Catholics murdering Pagans, not the other way around.

"Playing Baseball on Good Friday Insults the Church". Gimmie a break. If you really want to get technical, there's a 12-hour difference between Chicago and Jerusalem, so unless the Tigers are playing at midnight, it's irrelevant anyway.

But hey, this is the same Pope who restored into active duty several Bishops who are Nazi-sympathizing holocaust-deniers. He's also the same guy who suggested that voting for a pro-choice or gay-rights political candidate could be grounds for excommunication. Oh, and he did excommunicate a 12-year-old girl who was raped and had an abortion. The rapist, however, did not get excommunicated, since rape is apparently not a cardinal sin, but aborting a rapist's baby when you're the 12-year-old victim *is* a cardinal sin.

Can this religious leader be any less loving or be any more out of touch with reality?

Indigo Incarnates

I'm not referring to the sylvester Stallone movie, of course, hee hee. I did another 10 mile walk on the NCR trail and tool some more pictures of cool rock formations. It was a really nice walk. I heard so many birds twittering and cawing. I saw two cardinals as well.
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Indigo Incarnates

It's been a week since Ostara (spring equinox) and I'm happy to say that it seems like the dreaded, soul-freezing winter really is finally over. It was drizzling today but it was warm outside so I took a two mile walk. The flowers and trees are awakening. I'm really happy about this. I took a few pictures on my route.
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Indigo Incarnates

I have to vent about something that really pissed me off last night. My choir master has known for years that I have a dissociative disorder. She also knows that it's dangerous for me to drive too late at night. As energetic as I am during the day, that energy fades very quickly all at once. I'm not human. My metabolism just functions differently. So I know that when I start feeling tired, I have about half an hour before I'm no good for driving a car. The choir master knows this too.

And yet...

She insisted I stay 20 minutes past the point in which I said "I need to leave". It just wasn't an option. She demanded that I stick around to practice three additional pieces (one of which I play a whopping four notes!)

So I ran out of energy while driving. Halo incarnated. I'm co-conscious to remember the fact that Halo couldn't get this body's eyes to focus, so we drove home with car taillights and street lights looking like huge red and amber spheres. I don't know how we didn't end up getting pulled over by a cop.

I'm really pissed off that the choir master was willing to put me in a position where I could have wrecked my car. An yes, I know I should have left anyway. But it's my nature to give. It's my nature to help. It's not my nature to say "no" when people ask things of me. It is what it is. But I don't understand how it is that the choir master can know me personally for over ten years and not believe me when I tell her that it's just not safe for me to drive really late. A "few more minutes" turned into 20 and I barely got home.

That's my venting.

Blessed be